All About Family

As it is portrayed, Africans tend to have very large families; which also tends to be true there are usually more than two kids to a household. But it isn't only this that makes families so large but also the cultural impact that everyone is called like they are a relative. These can range from brother, sister, mother, father, aunt, uncle.. you get the picture.All elders are considered as parental figures in your life and should be shown the same respect as such. If you are sitting on the daladala and there are no seats left but an older person boards it is cultural to give up your seat for them. It's not just that friends are considered your brother or sister but even the waiter is called as such. No one would say hey waiter bring me the bill, it's always brother, auntie or whatever would fit. It is not uncommon to have a domestic servant which also you would never call as such but instead sister. These domestic servants, I believe are always younger girls around 14 to 17 but either way are considered part of the family. I'm sure you can tie this back to many things predating colonialism but socialism didn't hurt this concept after colonialism and independence. This could possibly be the reason why greetings are so important for this cultural because everyone is regarded as family. 

There are several interesting things to mention about family ties here beyond just the sense of community. In Swahili you have no aunts on your mother's side and no uncles on your father's side and incidentally there are no cousins because of this. Any sister you mother has is considered your mother as well, your mother's older sister would be big mama and an younger sister would be little mama same goes for your father with his brothers. Everyone grows up with lots of mothers and a whole lot of siblings. 

I just recently learned what to me is very strange about cousins however, and I am from Kentucky after all, but cousins often call each other husband or wife and can (not necessary) have relations with and marry each other. Also if you are a son, your grandmother is your wife and vise versa for a daughter but there is no sexual element there. Your grandparents are the ones would expected to provide for you and who you are to confide in first, even before your parents. Your mother's brother also plays this role. So when you get married your expected to give compensation to your other wives (cousins, grandmothers). On top of that when you plan to marry there is a bride price that is paid to your brides parents as well. This bride price is usually in monetary terms and is an agreement between the bride and groom.
To be honest everything to do with family ties is messy and if you're looking for specific and detailed answers you won't find them. I think it's better to accept it's their brother and not worry about whether he is actually biological or not. I'm convinced sometimes they can't ever tell you exactly how they are related to someone anyways.

Hakuna Matata, 

Kimberly